selling sex on craigslist, virginity myths debunked

Two articles of note crossed my inbox this morning. The first is about the trafficking of women and girls on Craigslist, which will make over $36 million this year from sex ads. I heard about this terrifying phenomenon when I attended a training last year provided by GEMS about the commercial sexual exploitation of children. If you don't know about GEMS already, check out their work: the documentary Very Young Girls, the Girls Are Not For Sale campaign, and their direct youth development work in the South Bronx. I know folks are working to challenge Craigslist to stop being "the biggest online hub for selling women against their will" (Stone NYT). If anyone knows specifically of ways to contribute, please share. Read the article! Thank you to Elizabeth for drawing my attention to this piece.

The second article is one over at Feministing. It is a list of virginity myths that were discussed and debunked at a "Rethinking Virginity" Conference at Harvard yesterday. The list is great, exploring everything from the "Queer Sex Doesn't Count" myth to the "Sex Within Marriage is the 'Healthiest' Kind" myth. The list does a good job of exploding homophobic and heteronormative ideas about sex; it also illuminates some of the consequences (duh!) of miseducating and shaming young people and, really, anyone about sex. You can find the article here.

I was especially interested in myths #4 and #10, which are about disrupting the before/after paradigm of virginity and encouraging the possibility of sex-positive abstinence. Too often are destructive dichotomies drawn between virginity/ sexuality or abstinence/ sexual activity.

I think about these dichotomies a lot in terms of Christianity. It has always fascinated (and disturbed) me that Christian ideology is often so complex, but when it comes to sexual ethics, the morality is reduced to the simple question of when, as in before or after a heterosexual marriage commitment. There are much deeper ethical questions to consider, such as consent, mutuality, freedom, power, respect, love, etc.

Both articles are about sex, sexuality, and what is and isn't sexually permissible in our culture (clearly, objectifying and selling young girls --- but not empowering young women to be sexual agents). I haven't been catcalled yet today, but I also have not left my house. So there!

Happy feminist reading, kids. And Happy Cinco de Mayo!


FEMINISTING - "Queer Sex Doesn't Count" And Nine Other Myths Uncovered - and Debunked - at the Harvard "Rethinking Virginity" Conference

NYT - Sex Ads Seen Adding Revenue to Craigslist

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catcalling chronicles, an introduction

I’ve been thinking about starting this blog for a while now. I’ve been encouraged by my partner and my best friend to write down the different experiences I have had with street harassment, catcalling, hollering, whatever you want to call it.

I am a native of Brooklyn, NY. The majority of my experiences with catcalling have been in Brooklyn or other parts of New York City. The place where I live (and come from) shapes my experiences and stories, of course, and I acknowledge this fact. At the same time, I recognize there are many ways in which my stories are not unique. There are memories and realities that link people of diverse gender and sexual identities across space and time.

So what exactly I will be blogging about? Excellent question.

For right now, I intend to blog about my daily experiences with catcalling. I may not write every day, but I will do my best to make this blog a true chronicle of things heard, said, seen, experienced…

Hopefully, by documenting the frequency of these incidents (as well as their violence and downright absurdity) I’ll be able to shed light on an all-too-common experience that is often dismissed, ridiculed, or straight-up exalted.

I have selfish motivations for the blog as well. I hope that by writing it all down and engaging in dialogue with others, I’ll be able to develop better strategies for resistance and keeping my peace of mind. I’m looking here for advice a little deeper and less dismissive than “Just don’t let it get to you.”

Some things are worth being angry about. Violence and patriarchy are high on my list of Things Worth Being Angry About.

With this being said, let’s get cracking! Venting, shedding light, and above all, connecting with one another!

Through testimony and listening we can inspire transformation. Smash patriarchy. All that good stuff.